Lucy's theme song

On the radio they explained that a Regina Spektor song was the theme song for Orange is the New Black.
Lucy: "What's a theme song?"
Me: "It's a song that always goes with a certain show or person."
Lucy: "What's our family's theme song?"
Me: "Hmm ... good question.  What do you think it is?"
Lucy: "Probably 'Peace Like a River.'"
This was actually a surprisingly accurate choice.  By Lucy's request, we sing it at every meal and before bedtime.  I only wish it was true, and we all did have 'peace like a river in our souls.'  Instead, I sometimes feel like a more appropriate theme song would be, Ozzy Osbourne's 'Crazy Train.'

This is not a 'Where's Waldo?' game

We've been teaching Lucy about different religions. After seeing a good friend of mine in a hijab, she now knows that Muslim women wear hijabs. There's only one problem. There are so few Muslim women in Charlottesville, when she sees one she gets so excited that she points and screams, "MUSLIM!"

To the stranger who gave me a weird look at Target this week, I swear we're not training a racist, preschool militia.

Slow down

Me: Hurry up eating your sandwich Lucy, we have a lot of errands to run today.
Lucy: Why do you run errands? I want to walk them.

If there's a will, there's a way

Lucy: Mom, where are the matches?
Me:  I'm not giving you matches.
Lucy: Fine, then I guess I'll have to find a volcano to roast my marshmallows!

Evil Minions

We saw Despicable Me 2 today.  Getting into the car ...


Me:  Argh!  I'm a purple minion!
Lucy: Mom, they're called EVIL minions.  I looked it up on the internet.

Although they may actually be called evil minions, considering she just learned how to spell her name, I find her explanation doubtful (though hilarious).

Going commando

During dinner ...
Me: Wait, are you wearing undies?
Lucy: No.
Me: Have you been without undies all day?
Lucy:  Do I have to wear them everyday?

She has a point

Me: Lucy, stop spraying water on the floor.  It's getting slippery.
Lucy: But Mom!  I'm an inventor!  You have to let inventors do whatever they want because that's how they invent things.