Pre-blog Lucyisms

I found these Lucyisms from before I started the blog.  I am posting them here so I don't lose them.

Feb. 1, 2012
Me: "Lucy, there's a sandwich here just waiting for you to eat it."
Lucy: "Good job waiting sandwich."

Dec. 24, 2011
Lucy: "I want to wear boots."
Caleb: "No. I hate your boots, they don't fit right and they always fall off. You're going to wear your tennis shoes."
Lucy: "SAY SORRY! Say sorry, you no hate my boots!"

November 22, 2011
Lucy figured out today that high-five-ing herself is really just the same thing as clapping.

November 20, 2011
This morning I woke up to Lucy talking with her stuffed "Clifford" dog in her crib. She sounded like she was on a blind date. "Clifford, do you have any hobbies? I like to play baseball."

November 4, 2011
We got free samples at the Lindt's chocolate store. On the way out the door ...
Clerk: "Have a nice day!"
Me: "Goodbye, thank you!"
Lucy: "Good job having chocolate!"

November 3, 2011
Me: "Lucy, say good bye to daddy, he's going to work to plant garlic."
Lucy: "Bye daddy. I plant garlic everyday."

October 27, 2011
Lucy made Halloween cookies at school today. When I picked her up she ran to me and said, "I EAT GHOSTS!"

October 23, 2011
Lucy found a daddy long legs on our front porch. She picked it up and played with it until it died from her mangling. Then she proceeded to hold a funeral for the spider, burying it under leaves and singing it a sad rendition of "The Itsy Bitsy Spider." I'm not sure whether I should be touched or disturbed.

October 19, 2011
Lucy is pulling out all the stops to get out of a nap today. In a stream of excuses as I was laying her down she said, "Poopy diaper, change it! Teeth hurt! Throw up! I scared! Not tired! I LOVE YOU MOMMA!"

October 17, 2011
This evening Lucy had an entire conversation with her fingers in which she told them the door was locked and they wouldn't be able to get through. Her fingers responded, "Get out of here!" She is beginning to be weird.

September 15, 2011
Today Lucy announced loudly in public (on at least 3 different occasions), "Mama is NOT naked!" In a surprised tone, as if I spend most of my time around her in the buff.

September 13, 2011
After reading Dora's World Adventure (which features a trip to China and teaches kids how to say "Ni Hao") Lucy is seriously confused about the difference between "Meow" and "Ni Hao". I'm pretty sure she thinks the cat speaks Chinese. She now greets it everyday saying, "Ni Hao."

August 30, 2011
How you can tell your family listens to too much NPR ... Lucy chewed up some food and spit it out. I said, "Lucy, don't do that, it's gross." Lucy looks at me and says, "Terry Gross!"

July 30, 2011
Lucy is laying on the ground, wriggly and quacking.
Me: "Lucy, what are you doing?"
Lucy: "I duck snake."

July 12, 2011
Me: "Lucy, don't eat cheese off the floor, yucky."
Lucy: "No, it's yummy."

July 5, 2011
Me: "What kind of ice cream would you like?"
Lucy: "Blue."
Me: "No, like what would you like your ice cream to taste like? Strawberries? Chocolate? Vanilla?"
Lucy: "Light."
Me: "Can you point to the kind of ice cream you want?"
Lucy: "No, honey."
I give up.

June 29, 2011
On the way to the library this afternoon:
Lucy: "Momma drives."
Me: "Yep, momma drives."
Lucy: "Lucy drives too?"
Me: "Nope."

June 28, 2011
At 20-months-old Lucy has already learned that the proper noise to emit when you're pretending to be asleep is "honk-shu, honk-shu."

June 27, 2011
This morning I farted. Lucy looked up in shock and said, "train?"

Arguing with the radio

Lucy is apparently getting ready for law school.
Song on radio: "Take me to your best friend's house ..."
Lucy: "I already went to my best friend's house today!"
Subsequent song on the radio: "Clap your hands! ... Stomp your feet! ... Now, dance!"
Lucy: "I AM clapping my hands ... I AM stomping my feet ... I can't dance because I'm in my car seat!"
Today I instituted a draconian "no-arguing-with-the-radio-or-else-we-turn-it-off" rule in the car.

Piggy Shoes

Lucy looks at the back of her shoes, "what does this say?"
Me: "It says C-R-O-C-S, Crocs. That's that name of your shoes."
Lucy: "I want to call them shoey. Then I can say 'Shoey! Shoey! Shoey!'" (imitating a pig call)

Said Lucy

Lucy has begun narrating her daily life.  She's been punctuating everything she says with, "said Lucy."  As in,
Me:  "What would you like for breakfast?"
Lucy:  "I would like buttery toast for breakfast, said Lucy."

Yellow Mac

Waitress: "How's your macaroni and cheese?"
Lucy: "It's yellow."

Mooses in your hair

Lucy: "What is that?"
Me: "It's mouse for my hair."
Lucy: "Mooses comb your hair?"

Treadmill Mommy

Me: "Lucy, please stop kicking me."
Lucy: "I'm not kicking you, I'm pretending you're a treadmill."

Car Mommy

Yesterday we spent 3 hours at the car dealership getting our car fixed. Lucy was beginning to get bored around 2 hours, so we decided to go look at the cars in the showroom. Lucy saw the new Toyota Scion "smart car" and sighed. "That little car misses its mommy."